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Saturday morning headlines 9/2/2016

BMTSoulja1

By BMTSoulja1
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WOSgrad

WOSgrad

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WILD HORSES, PROTESTERS KEEP ORANGE COUNTY AUTHORITIES BUSY FRIDAY NIGHT

LITTLE CYPRESS - For the second time in two weeks, the rampage of a stampeding heard of wild horses caused chaos and havoc at a local football stadium.  This time, however, there terror occurred in Northern Orange County at Battlin' Bear Stadium. At about 7:00 pm, the dispatchers' office of the Orange Country Sheriff's Department was flooded with frantic 911 calls from the stadium about wild horses trampling bears.  One visibly shaken fan told the Leaders' Van Wade, "IT WAS HORRENDOUS!  We were doing nothing but our traditional BOJO dance and chillin' to 'Everything Green, Everything Gold' when they came out of the south gate and trampled our poor little bears!  THEY TRAMPLED OUR BEARS!!!!"  A very irritated Dr. Pauline Hargrove, superintendent of the LC-M CISD angrily claimed "This madness has got to stop, I know there is a school district that is responsible for this and they need to be reprimanded!"  She then pointed to a school bus which was seen heading south on Highway 87 from which the audible phrase "YOU CAN'T WIN THE KENTUCKY DERBY WITH A MULE" could be heard.  Neither West Orange-Cove CISD officials or West Orange-Cove CISD Athletic Director Cornel Thompson were available for comment.  However, the story does have a happy ending as Sheriff Keith Merritt confirmed that none of the trampled bears were seriously injured.  "For the second week in a row, we've been lucky," said Merritt, "But if this continues, someone is going to get seriously hurt.

Sheriff Merritt also noted that the sheriff's deputies were hindered in responding to the chaos by a couple of protesters outside of Battlin' Bear Stadium.  The first of the protesters rushed deputies yelling "DO YOU CALL THIS TRAFFIC CONTROL?  THIS IS EMBARRASSING!" According to police reports he then started yelling "GRASS SUCKS! NO MORE GRASS! NO MORE GRASS, I CAN'T BALANCE MY CAVIAR AND CHAMPAGNE ON GRASS!"  As deputies took him into custody for disturbing the peace, he yelled at the arresting officers, "I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO TO ME, I AIN'T TELLING YOU WHERE MY KID IS!"  The court date for the man, identified as Gregory Poole of Mont Belvieu, has yet to be set.

And finally, the same man found outside of Dan R. Hooks Stadium last week by authorities was again in action Friday night in Little Cypress.  This time, according to officials, his protest consisted of him yelling at the visitor's side of the stadium, "Y'all ain't so great!  WE GREAT 'cause Greg Tepper says we great!"  Officials did not reveal the man's identity but did state their belief that he was from Eastern Harris County.

At the end of the night, a visibly tired Merritt uttered, "They simply do not pay us enough around here."

 

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BMTSoulja1

BMTSoulja1

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11 minutes ago, WOSgrad said:

WILD HORSES, PROTESTERS KEEP ORANGE COUNTY AUTHORITIES BUSY FRIDAY NIGHT

LITTLE CYPRESS - For the second time in two weeks, the rampage of a stampeding heard of wild horses caused chaos and havoc at a local football stadium.  This time, however, there terror occurred in Northern Orange County at Battlin' Bear Stadium. At about 7:00 pm, the dispatchers' office of the Orange Country Sheriff's Department was flooded with frantic 911 calls from the stadium about wild horses trampling bears.  One visibly shaken fan told the Leaders' Van Wade, "IT WAS HORRENDOUS!  We were doing nothing but our traditional BOJO dance and chillin' to 'Everything Green, Everything Gold' when they came out of the south gate and trampled our poor little bears!  THEY TRAMPLED OUR BEARS!!!!"  A very irritated Dr. Pauline Hargrove, superintendent of the LC-M CISD angrily claimed "This madness has got to stop, I know there is a school district that is responsible for this and they need to be reprimanded!"  She then pointed to a school bus which was seen heading south on Highway 87 from which the audible phrase "YOU CAN'T WIN THE KENTUCKY DERBY WITH A MULE" could be heard.  Neither West Orange-Cove CISD officials or West Orange-Cove CISD Athletic Director Cornel Thompson were available for comment.  However, the story does have a happy ending as Sheriff Keith Merritt confirmed that none of the trampled bears were seriously injured.  "For the second week in a row, we've been lucky," said Merritt, "But if this continues, someone is going to get seriously hurt.

Sheriff Merritt also noted that the sheriff's deputies were hindered in responding to the chaos by a couple of protesters outside of Battlin' Bear Stadium.  The first of the protesters rushed deputies yelling "DO YOU CALL THIS TRAFFIC CONTROL?  THIS IS EMBARRASSING!" According to police reports he then started yelling "GRASS SUCKS! NO MORE GRASS! NO MORE GRASS, I CAN'T BALANCE MY CAVIAR AND CHAMPAGNE ON GRASS!"  As deputies took him into custody for disturbing the peace, he yelled at the arresting officers, "I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU DO TO ME, I AIN'T TELLING YOU WHERE MY KID IS!"  The court date for the man, identified as Gregory Poole of Mont Belvieu, has yet to be set.

And finally, the same man found outside of Dan R. Hooks Stadium last week by authorities was again in action Friday night in Little Cypress.  This time, according to officials, his protest consisted of him yelling at the visitor's side of the stadium, "Y'all ain't so great!  WE GREAT 'cause Greg Tepper says we great!"  Officials did not reveal the man's identity but did state their belief that he was from Eastern Harris County.

At the end of the night, a visibly tired Merritt uttered, "They simply do not pay us enough around here."

 

Greatness, once again...

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Hagar

Hagar

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Santa Fe Band Director is notified that the generic artificial turf field at Barbers Hill has dew on it.  Filled with fear for his bands safety, he tells reporters his kids are not marching on that sh-t.  Questions why the BH school board doesn't build a dome stadium with a temperature controlled environment.  Santa Fe wins game 40-6.   BH protesters verbally attack their superintendent after game chanting. "Hey you twit, you're such a snob, get yourself another job.  Get out of here, with your goods and bed, move on back to Caney Head.

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Hagar

Hagar

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On August 31, 2016 at 2:21 PM, pdawg119 said:

Pirates suffer yet another blowout loss

Vidor fans at Pasadena Veterans Memorial Stadium left wondering, "Are we sure we were playing Barbers Hill and Pasadena Memorial, and not Allen and Manvel?"

Oops, had to stop the presses to rewrite this one lol.

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