Lumberton Girls Coach

[deep east texas]

Where did Gholson coach before Lumberton?

[Riding Solo]

[quote name="fiveoclocksomewhere" post="967749" timestamp="1297960014"]
I also would like to say that we can all post here and gripe and complain. Thats what these boards are for. But we need to be careful in calling for someone to be fired. You are talking about someones job. Putting groceries on the table is serious business.
Be certain before you complain to a school board or AD about what you feel is a problem with a coach.

Thats why sometimes I like to come on here and cuss and discuss with other parents, coaches, etc before I make up my mind about things.  There are some nuts, but there are some smart old hands on here too.

Ideally here at L-Town, it would be great if our coach could recognize the problem. Maybe a heart to heart with his AD and make an effort to improve his temper.  There have been discusions with him about it. But I do not believe he sees it as a problem. Which is a shame. Because like I said, they guy knows his X's and O's.

The question is will there be any players left to coach?

 
[/quote]

Good post.

[The Ingredient]

[quote name="fiveoclocksomewhere" post="967668" timestamp="1297956137"]
Slam14- You are mistaking me for for my good buddy with twin freshmen daughters.  ;D Thats a compliment. My daughter is a little older. Has played for Coach Gholson for two years.

Solo and Slam-Thanks for the comments and good advice.  I agree with you both for the most part. You can't let a coach run you off. That's why I told my daughter to suck it up. She loves playing basketball. I have no doubt in that. But I also doubt she will play next season for this coach. She will play the sports that she gets the most enjoyment from. She will make up her mind this Summer. Fortunately she is able to play pretty much any sport and do reasonably well. But I love watching her play BBall.

At what point does "tough coach" turn into "verbally abusive a-hole"? Very few of these kids have aspirations to play beyond high school. Why should they be subjected to being told every single day how bad they suck? I understand being tough. But why be mean-spirited also?

And yes Solo, there have been some parents that get overly involved and it transfers to the daughter/player. I have done my best to keep out of it. When my daughter has had a problem she has met with the coach on her own, without parents involved.  I was pretty proud of her for that actually.
Thanks again for the comments and advice.

[/quote][color=red][/color]

Let me thow in my 2cents here:
First of all as coachs we are not perfect and I have yet to meet a coach who is not very competitive in what we do. So we are going to push our kids to be the best they can be. Some kids just want to be part of a team and have fun. If as coaches we allow that for some kids, then the one's who are competitive will suffer, be it loses or just not being the best team they can be. IMO if you're only in it for the fun of it GET OUT! [b]Competitive sports are not for everyone.[/b] Doesn't make the kid any less in my eyes. Some of my favorite kids I teach do not play sports and they are GREAT kids who will be successful in life!
Whether or not you are a "tough coach" or an "a-hole" is an easy question to answer. WHEN and HOW is whatever is being considered negative being said?? If a kid doesn't get back on defense, he/she is likely going to hear about it, and he probably isn't going to like it. We as coaches aren't going to sugar coat anything. Being told you "suck"(not a good choice of words obviously) should motivate you to work harder so you don't "suck". What competitive person isn't trying to be the BEST that he/she can be??? Ever been scared to fail???

I, and I bet you, used to think our dads were a-holes. I did!! Looking back, he was an a-hole when I was NOT doing what I should have been doing! He wasn't an a-hole, I was an idiot!

Now if ANYONE, a coach or dad or whoever is an "a-hole" when you're doing what is right, then you've crossed the line and it becomes abuse as opposed to "tough love."

Now, I don't know first hand how Coach Gholson treats his girls, so I will not comment on who is right or wrong here.

I will only tell you the world is a mean, cruel place. And what I learned from my dad and coaches prepared me for that world, even though at the time they were preparing me, I didn't realize what was happening...

[BLUEDOVE3]

If the coach is teaching the game and preparing the team for another level of play, I don't care if he yells. Not enough to make a kid quit.

[Riding Solo]

[quote name="The Ingredient" post="967847" timestamp="1297971931"]
[quote author=fiveoclocksomewhere link=topic=80253.msg967668#msg967668 date=1297956137]
Slam14- You are mistaking me for for my good buddy with twin freshmen daughters.  ;D Thats a compliment. My daughter is a little older. Has played for Coach Gholson for two years.

Solo and Slam-Thanks for the comments and good advice.  I agree with you both for the most part. You can't let a coach run you off. That's why I told my daughter to suck it up. She loves playing basketball. I have no doubt in that. But I also doubt she will play next season for this coach. She will play the sports that she gets the most enjoyment from. She will make up her mind this Summer. Fortunately she is able to play pretty much any sport and do reasonably well. But I love watching her play BBall.

At what point does "tough coach" turn into "verbally abusive a-hole"? Very few of these kids have aspirations to play beyond high school. Why should they be subjected to being told every single day how bad they suck? I understand being tough. But why be mean-spirited also?

And yes Solo, there have been some parents that get overly involved and it transfers to the daughter/player. I have done my best to keep out of it. When my daughter has had a problem she has met with the coach on her own, without parents involved.  I was pretty proud of her for that actually.
Thanks again for the comments and advice.

[/quote][color=red][/color]

Let me thow in my 2cents here:
First of all as coachs we are not perfect and I have yet to meet a coach who is not very competitive in what we do. So we are going to push our kids to be the best they can be. Some kids just want to be part of a team and have fun. If as coaches we allow that for some kids, then the one's who are competitive will suffer, be it loses or just not being the best team they can be. IMO if you're only in it for the fun of it GET OUT! [b]Competitive sports are not for everyone.[/b] Doesn't make the kid any less in my eyes. Some of my favorite kids I teach do not play sports and they are GREAT kids who will be successful in life!
Whether or not you are a "tough coach" or an "a-hole" is an easy question to answer. WHEN and HOW is whatever is being considered negative being said?? If a kid doesn't get back on defense, he/she is likely going to hear about it, and he probably isn't going to like it. We as coaches aren't going to sugar coat anything. Being told you "suck"(not a good choice of words obviously) should motivate you to work harder so you don't "suck". What competitive person isn't trying to be the BEST that he/she can be??? Ever been scared to fail???

I, and I bet you, used to think our dads were a-holes. I did!! Looking back, he was an a-hole when I was NOT doing what I should have been doing! He wasn't an a-hole, I was an idiot!

Now if ANYONE, a coach or dad or whoever is an "a-hole" when you're doing what is right, then you've crossed the line and it becomes abuse as opposed to "tough love."

Now, I don't know first hand how Coach Gholson treats his girls, so I will not comment on who is right or wrong here.

I will only tell you the world is a mean, cruel place. And what I learned from my dad and coaches prepared me for that world, even though at the time they were preparing me, I didn't realize what was happening...

[/quote]


Good Post!!!!!

[Slam14]

[quote name="The Ingredient" post="967847" timestamp="1297971931"]
[quote author=fiveoclocksomewhere link=topic=80253.msg967668#msg967668 date=1297956137]
Slam14- You are mistaking me for for my good buddy with twin freshmen daughters.  ;D Thats a compliment. My daughter is a little older. Has played for Coach Gholson for two years.

Solo and Slam-Thanks for the comments and good advice.  I agree with you both for the most part. You can't let a coach run you off. That's why I told my daughter to suck it up. She loves playing basketball. I have no doubt in that. But I also doubt she will play next season for this coach. She will play the sports that she gets the most enjoyment from. She will make up her mind this Summer. Fortunately she is able to play pretty much any sport and do reasonably well. But I love watching her play BBall.

At what point does "tough coach" turn into "verbally abusive a-hole"? Very few of these kids have aspirations to play beyond high school. Why should they be subjected to being told every single day how bad they suck? I understand being tough. But why be mean-spirited also?

And yes Solo, there have been some parents that get overly involved and it transfers to the daughter/player. I have done my best to keep out of it. When my daughter has had a problem she has met with the coach on her own, without parents involved.  I was pretty proud of her for that actually.
Thanks again for the comments and advice.

[/quote][color=red][/color]

Let me thow in my 2cents here:
First of all as coachs we are not perfect and I have yet to meet a coach who is not very competitive in what we do. So we are going to push our kids to be the best they can be. Some kids just want to be part of a team and have fun. If as coaches we allow that for some kids, then the one's who are competitive will suffer, be it loses or just not being the best team they can be. IMO if you're only in it for the fun of it GET OUT! [b]Competitive sports are not for everyone.[/b] Doesn't make the kid any less in my eyes. Some of my favorite kids I teach do not play sports and they are GREAT kids who will be successful in life!
Whether or not you are a "tough coach" or an "a-hole" is an easy question to answer. WHEN and HOW is whatever is being considered negative being said?? If a kid doesn't get back on defense, he/she is likely going to hear about it, and he probably isn't going to like it. We as coaches aren't going to sugar coat anything. Being told you "suck"(not a good choice of words obviously) should motivate you to work harder so you don't "suck". What competitive person isn't trying to be the BEST that he/she can be??? Ever been scared to fail???

I, and I bet you, used to think our dads were a-holes. I did!! Looking back, he was an a-hole when I was NOT doing what I should have been doing! He wasn't an a-hole, I was an idiot!

Now if ANYONE, a coach or dad or whoever is an "a-hole" when you're doing what is right, then you've crossed the line and it becomes abuse as opposed to "tough love."

Now, I don't know first hand how Coach Gholson treats his girls, so I will not comment on who is right or wrong here.

I will only tell you the world is a mean, cruel place. And what I learned from my dad and coaches prepared me for that world, even though at the time they were preparing me, I didn't realize what was happening...

[/quote]
Good post. 

There is still a big gap between those who are REALLY in it to compete and those who are satisfied with a "participation ribbon"!

[AJ25]

Josh Mitchell would be great for the job.. Young guy who knows the game and loves working with the kids. He may not have as much experience as some other applicants (if the job were to open) but he's from Lumberton and it's always great if you can hire one of your own.

[bassman]

I agree with an earlier post. If kids today were coached like we were 25 years ago, most would not play. However, as a coach, telling a player "that was the worst effort I have ever seen"  or "that was a piss poor shot" is a long way from telling them they suck. Raising cain and hollering is something most coaches do from time to time. Verbally attacking a kid is not acceptable. A good coach knows the difference.

[AJ25]

6 kids quit in 2 years? Unless you're talking about football.. And assuming the work outs aren't army-like, there seems to be a common issue there..

[fiveoclocksomewhere]

[quote name="AJ25" post="968263" timestamp="1298051311"]
6 kids quit in 2 years? Unless you're talking about football.. And assuming the work outs aren't army-like, there seems to be a common issue there..
[/quote]

6 varsity players in 9 months. Nothing to do with basketball, playing time, or hard workouts. One was a Senior with two weeks left in the season. The common issue was treatment by the coach.

[Loudmouth]

I think one of the biggest things that gets over looked here is knowing your players.  Some may respond to a good butt chewing and others may react in an adversely to that method.  You need to know your players on an individual basis.  You can't treat each player the same in these regards. 

[Bobcat1]

[quote name="Loudmouth" post="968321" timestamp="1298058085"]
I think one of the biggest things that gets over looked here is knowing your players.  Some may respond to a good butt chewing and others may react in an adversely to that method.  You need to know your players on an individual basis.  [b]You can't treat each player the same in these regards.[/b] 
[/quote]

Very true.

[Riding Solo]

[quote name="Loudmouth" post="968321" timestamp="1298058085"]
I think one of the biggest things that gets over looked here is knowing your players.  Some may respond to a good butt chewing and others may react in an adversely to that method.  You need to know your players on an individual basis.  You can't treat each player the same in these regards. 
[/quote]

Sondra Ancelot said the same thing. She knew who could take a butt chewing or who could not. But she also knew what parents would allow it and what parents would not. I do understand that theory but don't agree with it. Why can't you treat everyone the same? Someone Correct me if I am wrong but when Nathan Toon was at Orangefield he pretty much chewed on everybodies butt. Maybe it is different with boys.

[Bobcat1]

[quote name="Riding Solo" post="968341" timestamp="1298059921"]
[quote author=Loudmouth link=topic=80253.msg968321#msg968321 date=1298058085]
I think one of the biggest things that gets over looked here is knowing your players.  Some may respond to a good butt chewing and others may react in an adversely to that method.  You need to know your players on an individual basis.  You can't treat each player the same in these regards. 
[/quote]

Sondra Ancelot said the same thing. She knew who could take a butt chewing or who could not. But she also knew what parents would allow it and what parents would not. I do understand that theory but don't agree with it. Why can't you treat everyone the same? Someone Correct me if I am wrong but when Nathan Toon was at Orangefield he pretty much chewed on everybodies butt. Maybe it is different with boys.
[/quote]


He got on our butts, but he did it in a different way I think for each...He knew yelling and screaming at Calvin Granger would help his game, yet getting in...well I'll message you the rest.  ;D

[Riding Solo]

[quote name="Bobcat05" post="968342" timestamp="1298060209"]
[quote author=Riding Solo link=topic=80253.msg968341#msg968341 date=1298059921]
[quote author=Loudmouth link=topic=80253.msg968321#msg968321 date=1298058085]
I think one of the biggest things that gets over looked here is knowing your players.  Some may respond to a good butt chewing and others may react in an adversely to that method.  You need to know your players on an individual basis.  You can't treat each player the same in these regards. 
[/quote]

Sondra Ancelot said the same thing. She knew who could take a butt chewing or who could not. But she also knew what parents would allow it and what parents would not. I do understand that theory but don't agree with it. Why can't you treat everyone the same? Someone Correct me if I am wrong but when Nathan Toon was at Orangefield he pretty much chewed on everybodies butt. Maybe it is different with boys.
[/quote]


He got on our butts, but he did it in a different way I think for each...He knew yelling and screaming at Calvin Granger would help his game, yet getting in...well I'll message you the rest.  ;D
[/quote]

I knew you would know Bobcat05. Oh well I was 90% correct. I do agree with using different styles of butt chewing on certain kids as long as they all get some kind of butt chewing.

[Riding Solo]

This is the most action the girls basketball forum has seen since January 1,2011. ;D ;D

[fiveoclocksomewhere]

I think boys take the yelling, butt chewing, and cursing differently than girls do. I also don't think it is needed very often. If you are having to yell and scream all the time, you are not doing a very good job teaching in the first place.

[fiveoclocksomewhere]

[quote name="deep east texas" post="967792" timestamp="1297964085"]
Where did Gholson coach before Lumberton?
[/quote]
Mount Enterprise for a year or two. Don't know before that.

[Loudmouth]

I was referring to the boys side.  All will receive the chewing they need when necessary, it is just the manner in which you go about it.  This will probably be the same or even more so of an issue on the girls side.