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The 'Real' Saturday Morning Headlines 9/29/2012 Edition


BMTSoulja1

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Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite   
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[quote name="Smoking Baby" post="1283136" timestamp="1348759186"]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]

I spit my coffee out... ::)
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[quote name="Smoking Baby" post="1283136" timestamp="1348759186"]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]

Should have sent this one to the editor first...PN-G will be at home this week. Lumberton coming to us. So dont unload the wheelchairs.
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[quote name="NDNation" post="1283140" timestamp="1348759413"]
[quote author=Smoking Baby link=topic=103750.msg1283136#msg1283136 date=1348759186]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]

Should have sent this one to the editor first...PN-G will be at home this week. Lumberton coming to us. So dont unload the wheelchairs.
[/quote]

Just does not have the same affect if the Poodles don't have to watch the game on the PNG field........ ;) ;)
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[quote name="Smoking Baby" post="1283136" timestamp="1348759186"]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]

Were the heck to you come up with this stuff  8) +1 for originality... to funny.
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[quote name="incognito" post="1283149" timestamp="1348759738"]
[quote author=Smoking Baby link=topic=103750.msg1283136#msg1283136 date=1348759186]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]

Were the heck to you come up with this stuff  8) +1 for originality... to funny.
[/quote]Except for the fact that he probably offended anyone on this sight that may be handicap!!!
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[quote name="NDNation" post="1283140" timestamp="1348759413"]
[quote author=Smoking Baby link=topic=103750.msg1283136#msg1283136 date=1348759186]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]

Should have sent this one to the editor first...PN-G will be at home this week. Lumberton coming to us. So dont unload the wheelchairs.
[/quote]

Don't worry. We still won't need much room on the field and the game will be over early. ;D
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[quote name="godawggo" post="1283152" timestamp="1348760000"]
[quote author=incognito link=topic=103750.msg1283149#msg1283149 date=1348759738]
[quote author=Smoking Baby link=topic=103750.msg1283136#msg1283136 date=1348759186]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]

Were the heck to you come up with this stuff  8) +1 for originality... to funny.
[/quote]Except for the fact that he probably offended anyone on this sight that may be handicap!!!
[/quote]

Most handicapped folks I know are pretty thick skinned...and have a pretty good sense of humor.  ;)
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Mystery on the Neches !!

Pirate ship found burning and adrift on the Neches river, when the Coast Guard boarded the ship they found mysterious bite marks all over the ship and an Old English "N" carved into the deck.  The crew apparently jumped ship and went to find a real offense.
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                                            NO TITLE GAME THIS YEAR
The third installment of the Beaumont Bowl city championship series was cancelled last night just prior to game time because of a massive power outage at Da Butch attributed to bad wiring. In emergency session BISD school board voted to declare the series a tie. Steps were also taken in the meeting to contract a local electrican for the necessary wiring repairs. The contractor has assured the board that the repairs will be completed in two days and the do-over another three days thereby being ready for next weeks schedule. A vital clause in the contract stipulates that overcharges totaling less than $3 million will be paid in a prompt and timely manner. Other terms of the contract have not been disclosed.
(cover story currently being contrived)
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[quote name="Smoking Baby" post="1283136" timestamp="1348759186"]
Vidor Gazzette

Notice:  All 10 visitor tickets have been sold to the Vidor Pirates vs. Nederland Poodles game.  Vidor ISD did not anticipate 80% of the Nederland polulation being handicapped, therefore the game is going to be aired Friday night from PNG stadium for those with an ADA approved handicap.  More than substantial space will be available on the PNG field for wheel chairs, crutches, bed pans, etc......., as PNG is visiting the power-house Lumberton.  If interested, please submit by certified overnight mail, a "Vidor ISD Handicap Affidavit" form to the Vidor ISD Athletic Director.  Submit your forms early, as PNG only has 4 handicap parking spots.

Sincerely,
Jean Laffite 
[/quote]Lmbo.
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[quote name="bigdog" post="1283166" timestamp="1348760472"]
Mystery on the Neches !!

Pirate ship found burning and adrift on the Neches river, when the Coast Guard boarded the ship they found mysterious bite marks all over the ship and an Old English "N" carved into the deck.  The crew apparently jumped ship and went to find a real offense.
[/quote]I've just spot my coffee on my computer screen.  Good one, BD!
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Vidor dog pound picks up an alarming number of Bulldogs friday night dazed and confused and not able to find their way home!!!! Spokesperson for the pound was asked if the Bulldogs posed any threat and he said " THEY STILL HAVE SOME BARK IN THEM BUT DEFINITELY NO BITE LEFT"  He also asked the citizens of Vidor to do what ever they could do to help any remaining Bulldogs find their way home!!!!!
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[quote name="coach pops" post="1283171" timestamp="1348760683"]
                                            NO TITLE GAME THIS YEAR
The third installment of the Beaumont Bowl city championship series was cancelled last night just prior to game time because of a massive power outage at Da Butch attributed to bad wiring. In emergency session BISD school board voted to declare the series a tie. Steps were also taken in the meeting to contract a local electrican for the necessary wiring repairs. The contractor has assured the board that the repairs will be completed in two days and the do-over another three days thereby being ready for next weeks schedule. A vital clause in the contract stipulates that overcharges totaling less than $3 million will be paid in a prompt and timely manner. Other terms of the contract have not been disclosed.
(cover story currently being contrived)
[/quote]Hater.
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[quote name="bigdog" post="1283166" timestamp="1348760472"]
Mystery on the Neches !!

Pirate ship found burning and adrift on the Neches river, when the Coast Guard boarded the ship they found mysterious bite marks all over the ship and an Old English "N" carved into the deck.  The crew apparently jumped ship and went to find a real offense.
[/quote]

Update: The Pirate ship found adrift on the Neches was towed back to safe harbor in Vidor and upon further investigation the Old English "N" carved into the deck was found to be one of four notches signifying the fourth straight win for the Pirates officials said. The assumed missing Pirates were said to have started swimming and was last spotted coming ashore in BMT. searching for a real offensive opponent to play. ;)
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